Muscimol made me normal

I am a research chemicals (and just drugs) enthusiast with serious mental issues, who has been trying to fix himself by self medication. So about 3 days ago I took some xanax, whiskey and 5mg of pure muscimol (im talking solid tab) just for fun. Next two days i felt better, like my despession and anxiety went away for a while, along with s*icidal thoughts. I became more optimistic and energetic, but didn't think much about it. Then today i again started feeling despessed and hopeless, the usual thoughts returned. Then I took 20mg (4 tabs) of muscimol, for fun again. First there was nothing. Then i started feeling nauseous for about 20 minutes. And then... Oh my God! I felt like i was normal. Anxiety gone, depression gone, thoughts gone, it felt like all my barriers have been destroyed, i could for example offer a girl to date, eat in public, speak clearly and without second thoughts. But in the same time i was super body drunk, like I couldn't walk properly and made a lot of mistakes when typing on a keyboard. But mentally my mind was crystal clear, i could speak properly, i wasnt drunk at all. And the main thing, i felt NORMAL, finally, after all this years of suffering i felt optimistic and energetic. It felt like nothing like benzos or other types of drigs. In about two weeks a have an appointment with psychiatrist (1st time with her), and my question is, should i tell her about all of this? And more importantly, is there a medication that works like muscimol, but without body high and others side effects? I felt like i was reborn today, and i really need medical treatment, my life literally depends on it, all i want is to live normal life without suffering. Thanks for your attention if you read all of this, and please, give me an answer - what i should do and what i shouldn't. PLEASE dont ignore my post, I appreciate it very very much!