My fiancé killed himself

I don’t know why I’m posting here, but I have no friends or anyone I can talk to, he was my life. I forgave all the physical abuse, financial, sexual everything and he’s done this now. How do I even process this. How could he do this to me. I loved him the moment I saw him, he was so broken but I loved him with everything. How do I do this. I left all my family and friends to be with him, and I still haven’t cried.