Need some help getting over a strong emotional connection

A few months ago I (37f) experienced a whirlwind romance that left me with a lot of grief.

I have been single for about 6 years due to a combination of taking an intentional break after a boyfriend cheated/treated me poorly, pandemic, moving states a few times, and not finding someone I felt a genuine connection with.

I met a man (43m) through mutual friends and we just clicked. This is unheard of for me, but I wrote in my journal the day I met him that I thought I might had met the love of my life. I hadn’t felt so strongly for someone in over a decade, and he seemed to have very strong feelings for me too. We were just friends at the time, but it was an emotional connection that felt cosmic.

After just few weeks of officially seeing each other, he admitted (without any prompt from me) that he thought I might be his person. I admitted I felt similarly. But we agreed we still were early and that time would tell.

Well, unfortunately I think everyone knows where this ended up. It wasn’t the love story we’d both hoped for - after a few weeks of telling me he wanted a relationship, he decided to break it off. I was feeling the same way at the time as it became pretty clear to both of us that he needed to take care of his mental health and couldn’t prioritize a relationship. There were a few other issues but it wasn’t anything we couldn’t have worked through.

Normally, I have solid emotional boundaries, especially when you’re first getting to know someone. I am reasonable and I like to ease into getting to know people. But with him, I felt so safe that I completely let my guard down. He and I also have many close friends in common who were so excited to hear we were dating, and I think their reassurance caused me to create a false narrative of our compatibility.

I saw him again a few weeks after we broke it off, and I thought I was going to be able to move on and build a friendship with him, but seeing him just brought all the feelings back and I ended up crying for a long time, and asking him to reconsider dating. He was pretty stoic about the whole thing and held firm that he wasn’t emotionally available. I believe him and respect his decision, but it doesn’t make it hurt any less. I said I’d take space and maybe we could reconnect as friends later down the line. I know it isn’t right, I know it’s not going to happen, and I know we weren’t being fair to each other by putting pressure on a new romance in the first place.

We had a mutual friend in town this weekend and were around each other for the first time since that conversation. Now I’ve been nearly in tears all day, feeling devastated that it’s likely never going to happen, and like I missed my chance at the deepest connection I’ve felt in a long time.

I know I need to move on, but my heart is struggling. Has anyone dealt with this, or have advice on how to move past this grief?

Edit: I just want to thank everyone for their heartfelt responses and for sharing their own experiences here. It’s comforting to know how many of you have been here before, and that it is possible to move forward and continue to look for the love we dream of. You all are so kind, and your support really helps - even though we are all anonymous strangers, we are tied together by our desire for love, and that is so beautiful! Wishing you all the best, and please know how grateful I am for your kindness, respect and compassion ❤️‍🩹