I am possibly the best meth smoker alive today

My shit never burns and I use torch lighters. And I can literally do it all with my eyes closed. I have the muscle memory to know exactly how to hold everything the ideal distance and when to remove the flame and SUUUUCK.

It’s a shame to be this talented and unable to showcase my skills somewhere. If smoking meth ever becomes an olympic sport, I promise I’ll bring home the goal and make America proud.