How did I go from an Covid vaccine loving, pro-choice atheist to a "life is sacred", "we are powerless to nature's whim's", spiritual but not religious ass bitch?
I'm a 23F and in college I was one of those people that simped for the CDC, thought housewives were brainwashed morons, and thought abortion should be legal at any time, for any reason. I didn't believe that life had a greater purpose. I thought we just appeared here one day from evolution and that was it. Now I'm pro-life(ish, I don't think women should have to carry babies from rapists but I think people should be responsible for life they created), question modern medicine, am pro-conspiracy theory (as in, we should be able to hear them out), and think God exists. If you study any of the natural sciences, I don't know how you can come to any conclusion other than that. I think God is basically just the Universe. I think He did the Big Bang. I used to get angry when people suggested that someone "died for a reason". Now I'm like, well, maybe! Who the fuck are we to think we know everything?
I also watched a documentary about antinatalism last night ("I Wish You Were Never Born"). And it was fascinating to me because I thought they were making perfect sense. We could prevent all human suffering by not having any more kids. Every thing they were saying made logical sense. But I couldn't help but feel as if life were a precious thing that we should fight for, in spite of all the bad in the world. And I realized I didn't have any logical way to defend this position, it was just something I felt. And then I went on Twitter and saw the shit with sighswoon, she was getting called a Nazi, a fascist, stupid, and evil for saying she missed the days when we could call things natural disasters and unify under our powerlessness under nature and God. I felt that everything she was saying was incredibly true. So my question is, what do you think about people who have these beliefs? Are they stupid? Or are they actually smarter than their detractors? Are they living in denial? For me, I just got tired of the feelings of hopelessness and misery. I may be happier now, but am I truly seeing things as they actually are? Or am I a moron in denial?