My (29f) husband (31m) chooses alone time over me

My husband of 5 years and I had an amazing sex life for years. We'd have sex 3-5 times a week, and it was wonderful. Everything from quickies before work to passionate love making. I was so satisfied and loved it. Despite this, we both occasionally masturbated and that's normal and healthy. No problem with that at all.

In the last 9 months to year, we've suddenly started only having sex one a week to once every 3 weeks. Occasionally we were have sex on special occasions a few times in one week, but that's getting farther and further between.

I have caught him masturbating 1-4 times a week. I don't usually have an issue with it, but now it's making me feel like he'd rather do that than have sex with me. I initiate, wear lingerie, offer blowjobs, plan date nights, try to schedule things for the night and send flirty texts during the day, and nothing seems to make him want me anymore unless he initiates (rarely). I'm fit, have great hygiene, take care of my skin and hair, and he assures me I'm beautiful and he's attracted to me, but none of it seems to matter.

Is it normal to feel rejected, unattractive, and unwanted? When I've talked to him he has told me I'm overreacting and trying to control him and say him masturbating is bad. I've told him I don't care, I do it too, but when I'm practically on my knees asking for sex and he turns me down to instead jerk off later it kills my confidence and hurts me.

He's not a porn addict, he uses it quick to get off, just like i do, and it's not daily. I just..am really struggling with feeling unwanted because he will turn me down to masturbate instead. How can i help him understand that it's not the action I have an issue with, but how it makes me feel in tandem with constant rejection?

TLDR: my husband and I had a great sex life until a year ago when he started turning me down, and masturbating instead. We went from 3-6 times a week to less than 1, while he masturbates a few times a week.